Soccer is Back

Emma is on the Folsom Fillies this year! It's great because there are so many girls from our ward on her team, which is a plus. She is quite the entertaining goalie this year, as well. She will squat down and grab the ball and then roll every time, even though it is completely unnecessary. But it sure is fun to watch!

Brooke thinks watching the games is painfully and terribly boring. 

 Our fearless coaches JJ and Jeremy. 

 The chair "malfunctioned" at this game and mom ended up on the ground. Sorry to embarrass ya mom. No wait, I'm actually not sorry cause we got such a good laugh out of it! :)

Cori's 30th Birthday WEEKlong extravaganza!

 My sister Cori Ann decided that she was not going to pout about turning 30, no sir. She decided to live it up for almost a whole WEEK of celebration. She went out to dinner with Don one night, then had a Girl's Night at the movies/ dinner at Bj'S/ shopping at Folsom Outlets with my mom, Carli and I another night. The next night was an adult's only party at her house, catered by Rubio's and decorated very cutely! The next night was a family party, meaning the kids were allowed. :)

At the Family party Don surprised her with something aMaZInG!

 And you can tell by the look on her face that he did a good job. . . 

Beautiful photos of the boys taken by our good friend Angie Earp. 

Happy Birthday Cori Ann! So glad I could celebrate with you for almost a whole week, especially now that I can use that as an excuse to expect the same gift when I turn 30! ;) Got that Alan?

Our Law School Decision

This morning I woke up to Emma calling me, over and over. She was very upset because she had a scary dream. "Not all of it was scary, though," she said. I had her come lay down in bed with me since Alan had already left for work. One part of the dream that didn't scare her was that daddy was there and he had an old brown journal (probably like his mission journal that she's seen), and in the dream he had drawn or carved a picture of our family on the front page. Then she saw that he had written or carved her name on every single page. She was very touched by this dream and started to cry. I'll tell you how this relates to law school in a minute.

The Decision: After much fasting, pleading, prayers, scouring the scriptures/ conference talks, seeking counsel from parents/ siblings/ friends/ bishops/ colleagues/ guidance counselors, trips to the temple, and about 6 weeks of discussion as a couple, we have finally decided to quit law school. This has been one of the hardest decisions in my entire life, possibly THE hardest because the Lord didn't just give us the answer. When I prayed about marrying Alan, for example, I felt the Spirit tell me it was right, several times. I did not receive that immediate instruction about this decision, which was frustrating. But the Lord lets us struggle a bit on our own so we can learn and gain experience. Like I told my teenage Sunday School class this week, the Lord thinks experience is super awesome and so valuable, and He wants to have many experiences, good ones and bad ones, so we can learn and grow and develop patience and character. After all, that's why we're here.Waiting to reach this decision and to know what is right for us has been a tough experience indeed, but one we have learned from.

The last 3.5 years we've dedicated our LIVES to this goal of law school, so it was VERY difficult to let all that go. We don't consider ourselves the quitting types, so we never thought it would come to this. Many tears of frustration and fear have been shed over this. But when we weighed the options the answer eventually became clear. I think sometimes the Lord intervenes and inspires in a certain direction and sometimes he lets us make decisions based on practicality. We realized that because of our recent credit decline and inability to qualify for loans, it would take Alan 4 more years to complete law school, plus another year or so after that to pass the BAR. Then he would search for an internship which is required in order to score a job. And if you're lucky enough to get one of these highly sought after internships, it will likely be unpaid due to the economy. So we'd struggle A LOT more. Alan also learned from a guidance counselor at school that he would probably start out at his first job making half of what he can make as a computer programmer. We thought about our MANY thousands of dollars of student loans and realized we'd be hard pressed to repay them if he becomes a lawyer. And he's not the only one: there are law students actually suing their schools for being too expensive in comparison to the average lawyer salaries.

So we thought about this. And how much more time we will miss as a family if he stays in school for 4 more years.

And how much more debt we will be in.

And being gone before the girls wake up and home after they are asleep.

And how fast the girls are growing up.

And how I was in the E.R. last month with gastritis from stress, not to mention all my other stress related illnesses over the last few years.

And how we yearn for job stability.

And how close we came to wondering if our marriage was going to make it.

And we decided to stop the madness.

Keeping our family together and making memories every precious day is more important than any degree. We thought we could handle law school with a family and significant financial obligations, but we were wrong. Basically, law school kicked our BUTTS all over town! And we've accepted that.

* * * * *

Emma said the scary part of her dream was that daddy was trying to knock down a building and he got arrested for it, (probably a thought triggered by The Incredibles). To me that's symbolic. In real life he thought he needed to be Mr. Incredible and "knock down buildings" by taking on big challenges like law school and starting a business from scratch, but they ending up being wrong for him and our family. In reality, just spending TIME with us and providing for our needs makes him Mr. Incredible and Superman and all those things bundled up into one. He doesn't need a law degree to be Mr. Incredible to us. I am so thankful he knows that now. Maybe he wouldn't have learned that otherwise?

Emma loved that her name was written in that old brown journal in her dream. And now that we will have the sweet time we need as a family, he really can and has now chosen to carve her name in every page of every day of his life.

P.S. to my Disney Post

Here are the Disney movies and shows I can think of where there actually are BOTH parents:

101 Dalmations
Lady & The Tramp
The Incredibles
Even Stevens show and Movie
That's So Raven
Wizards of Waverly Place
Spy Kids 1, 2, 3
Mary Poppins
Lizzie McGuire show and Movie
Phil of the Future

Disney, what's your deal?

Ever notice how there is almost always a parent missing in Disney movies and TV shows? This was starting to bug so I decided to make a list to see just how bad it was. Here you go:

Brother Bear hunter kills mother

Bambi hunter kills mother

The Fox & The Hound hunter kills mother

Cinderella mother died

Finding Nemo mother died
Snow White mother died

Chicken Little mother died
Smart House mother died
Jump In! mother died
The Game Plan mother died
Little Mermaid no mother

Beauty and the Beast no mother

Cow Belles no mother

Chronicles of Narnia no mother

A Goofy Movie no mother

Pocahontas no mother

Princess Protection Program no mother

Hannah Montana show and Movie no mother

Cory in the House no mother

Herbie: Fully Loaded no mother

The Great Mouse Detective no mother

Enchanted Giselle's mother is dead and Morgan's mother left

Aladdin Jasmine has no mother, Aladdin has no parents

Toy Story 1,2, 3 no father

Ice Princess no father

The Princess Diaries no father

Suite Life of Zach & Cody no father

Suite Life on Deck no parents

Bolt Penny has no father

Hunchback of Notre Dame no father, mother was killed before scene one

Dumbo no father, mother taken away

Princess and the Frog father dies

The Lion King father dies

Treasure Planet father leaves

Pinnochio only a father figure

Lilo and Stich no parents

Atlantis: The Lost Empire no parents

Ratatouille parents died

Tarzan Tarzan's parents died and Jane has no mother

UP audience is unclear who/ where Russel's parents are

Sleeping Beauty raised by three aunts

The Sword in the Stone orphaned

Jungle Book orphaned

Meet the Robinsons orphaned

James and the Giant Peach orphaned

Pete's Dragon orphaned

The Rescuers orphaned

Peter Pan orphaned

Oliver and Company orphaned

Angels in the Outfield orphaned

The Three Musketeers orphaned

I love Disney as much as the next gal, but isn't that rather disturbing? Maybe they do that so you'll see that the character's parent(s) died, and you'll feel for them and want to fill that gap for them. My major was Cultural Studies so this kind of thing intrigues me. What do you think?

A Letter to My Parents

Dear Mom and Dad,

Tonight I laid in bed with Emma trying to help her fall asleep. As she drifted off, I realized how rarely I have done that. I began to reflect on the last few years and I felt the desire to apologize to Emma that I haven't been able to give her all the energy I've wanted to or be the mom I should have been due to my postpartum depression when Brooke was born, and the stress and exhaustion of Alan in law school.

Then I realized that's how you must have felt when grandma was sick and dying for 6 years, living with us. You must have wished you could give more, but simply couldn't. Then I had a good cry and wondered why things are so painful in life. Then I remembered what Wesley from The Princess Bride said,

"Life is pain, Highness. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something."

And I had a good laugh. And I thought about Heavenly Father and Jesus and how They can make all things work together for our good. And I had another good cry. And I promised Emma and Brooke I'll try to make every day the best I can.

And I felt very grateful for you. I love you.

Love,

Me