Hollywood and Monogamy

So it's hip to be anti-monogamy in Hollywood these days. Apparently, marriage is lame now. Every time I hear another celebrity opine about this, it leaves me sighing to myself thinking, "You're KILLING me, Smalls." 

For example, actress Shailene Woodley from the Divergent movies said: 

“I just haven’t met anyone where I was like, ‘Wow I could definitely see myself spending a season of my life with you.’ I don’t even know if humans are genetically made to be with one person forever.”

So because she hasn't met anyone she would be willing to commit to, the entire institution of marriage as human kind has known it for centuries is wrong? The establishment that has proven to give children and spouses the most stability financially and emotionally just doesn't work anymore because some say it's too hard? Yes, plenty of people think it's easier to do whatever, whenever, with whomever than to commit to one person, but easier doesn't mean better.

Here's another example-- remember Hillary Duff from Disney Channel? Here are her thoughts after her 4 year marriage ended:

"It wasn't working well enough to stay together, but there was still a lot of love involved. It was just a slow set-in of us not being the match that we used to be. . .  I don't know if people are meant to be together forever. Things happen over a long relationship that you can't always fight. A marriage of 20 years, the accomplishment of that must feel really great, but there are also huge sacrifices. I just always want to fight for happiness."

Yeah, I guess if your marriage isn't making you happy 100% of the time, don't fight for it, just quit. If it's too much work or sacrifice, just move on and look for a "better match." Heaven help us. That's what marriage IS!!! Sacrifice, hard work, patience, repentance, forgiveness, and FIGHTING for each other no matter what this world may throw at you. You DECIDE to be their match. You don't just lay down and surrender when it's not fun anymore. Of course "things happen over a long relationship"-- you're married to a human being who is imperfect by nature. It's like some people expect it to be all be skittles and rainbows, and when it stops being that way, they take it as a sign that it's no longer meant to be or that it's time to search for greener pastures. Can you imagine if everyone did that when they realized marriage is harder than they thought it would be? Every child on earth would be from a broken family. This would effect society negatively in ways we can't even being to imagine. 

I know some marriages need to end and sometimes there are issues beyond your control. What I'm referring to are those who claim it's fine and even expected to just give up because sometimes marriage stretches you beyond your comfort zone or because it's too hard to stay with one person. We can do better than this! Have a little creativity! Have a little stick-to-itiveness! Focus more on the other person's happiness and less on your own! Take a little more seriously the sacred promises you made to them on your wedding day for crying out loud! 

I love what Matt Walsh said about marriage in his recent blog post titled, "I Think There Are Irreconcilable Differences In My Marriage."

"[Marriage has] been hollowed out, emptied of its substance, and remolded into a pointless little toy. A phase. A novelty. A hobby. Something to complement our lifestyles and personal ambitions, but never to challenge us, or change us, or make us work or sacrifice or compromise or forgive. 

Marriage is a sacrament built on love, sacrifice, and self-denial. Our love for our spouses should mirror Christ’s love for us, and I can’t help but notice that Christ never said, “Sorry guys, but we’re just not that compatible. Looks like I won’t be able to die for you. I think I just need to work on myself for a while, you know?" 

Well said. Slow clap for Matt Walsh. Yes indeed.
In another post he wrote called "Marriage Doesn't Work If You're a Narcissist," he responds to a critic who claimed that staying married when you're not into it anymore is being "phony." Matt wrote:


"No, these people are doing what they’re supposed to do. It’s called effort. It’s called selflessness. It’s called not everything is about your damned feelings. Sometimes you have a job to do. A duty. A responsibility to your wife, to your kids, and to God."

Boomshakalaka, Good Sir. I'm glad to know there are people in this world who still get it.